What is Deadpool?


From the man who messed up Green Lantern and Deadpool, you know the guy from unmemorable sitcom ‘Two Guys, A Girl and a Pizza Place’ comes Deadpool. A story of love, loss and identity, of trusting others when you are at your lowest and of a man who despite it all just hopes that people will stand by him so that he may stand by someone else.

Spoiler that last bit doesn’t go so well.

For this is…………


We start with the car chase/ wreck we see in all the trailers. I would say I’m going to keep my review there so as to avoid spoilers but I’m really not. I’m probably going to spoil that scene for you and then proceed to spoil the rest of it too. Also due to having actually gone outside to see this, at a cinema, with other people I won’t be gifting you my usually artisticly brilliant cheap ms paint screen shots and so will be relying on random gumph I find online. Don’t like it? Go somewhere more professional. Like literally anywhere.


Anyway as I said before I rudely interrupted myself the movie opens with the high speed car fight as Deadpool drops in unannounced, turns out he is looking for an old “friend” called Francis and this will take him through perhaps the best super heroic opening credits since ‘Watchmen’ to his meeting with the ‘X-Men’ (or at least the two the studio was prepared to spring for) and into the opening of his flashback origin. To clarify the credits open with more than enough self awareness to assure people that the movie isn’t just all hype, the fight is quick and well executed and the X-Men will be standing in for Cable because we haven’t even got Scott and Jean right yet net alone their cybernetic time travelling son. The flashback waits until we’re invested enough before going ‘oh yeah of course we can’t have a superhero movie without a laborious origin story.’ I would make the old comment that we got through ‘Die Hard’ just fine without a retelling of how and why John McClaine joined the police force or met Holly. I would say that but Hollywood has seen the error of its ways and is of course providing us with that much needed back story soon.

Turns out that Wade Wilson is out for revenge on the man that left him looking like a ‘testicle with teeth’ and it has been a long journey and it won’t be over until the two meet atop a parked S.H.I.E.L.D Hellicarrier that Sam Jackson has dropped off for a paintjob. Now things don’t start well for Wade when he realises that he left his big bag of guns at home and so must make do with twelve bullets and a sharp wit.

Oh and two sharp swords and a healing factor which can cope with pretty much anything.

Things seem to be going his way until the X-men catch wind of his latest endeavour on a once busy over pass and come to insist that if he won’t join them could he at least stop blowing up parts of the city. Or at least the parts that people are still using.

Again this bit is pretty much from the trailer with Colossus, the best he is been on screen thus far, and NegaSonic Teenage Warhead, nothing like her comic book counter part as she doesn’t die within two seconds of being introduced just to set up some angst and drama for a more important character and also having her powers shifted over from telepathy to a cross between Cannonball and Boom-Boom.


To be fair to NegaSonic she may end up being the break out character of the movie and I’m personally hoping that if we do get an actual X-Force movie they stick her in the line up. Anyway they will be the straight man, er men, er people to Deadpools unique brand of off the wall wackiness, including but not limited to calling out his talking to ‘forth walls’ that only he can see because you can’t really have Deadpool without a straight man and Rorschach was busy, doing what I don’t know. Waiting for more terrible prequel comics I imagine.

Anyway once our motivation for the movie is set up it’s time for exposition as we travel back in time to find that Wade has always been as off the world, self referential and mad as we know him, it’s just back then he was a merc who handled creepy teenage boys and had a bad case of ‘the cancer’. He also had a smoking hot girlfriend played by Inara who despite playing CopyCat won’t be changing shape or being a skilled killer herself.


I reckon J-Law was scared of the competition. Or the make up chair by the looks of the new trailer which shows a Mystique post Mutant pride once more making herself look human for the majority of the film.

Venessa isn’t the only old face to show up though with Weasel and Blind Al both dropping by and even Bob pops up ‘sans Hydra obviously’. They all play the characters who have been knocking around the local comic book shop well and the movie manages fairly well in walking the line. They don’t overplay the guts and gore nor stick in a forth wall break just because they can. Well perhaps except for when they’re wiping gum off the lens. The Humour stays pretty consistent even when they dive into caner riddled flashbacks and tortuous weekends at camp ‘Weapon X’.


I wouldn’t say the trailer had all the best gags but its fair to say that if you didn’t laugh at them you ain’t going to find too much here to laugh at. If you did then sit back and enjoy one of the best super hero movies in a disappointingly long time.

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