We started with a healer looking for group and here we are four movies later, end in sight, with our group now looking for a healer. We’ve got a rookie spell slinger, a tank who just misses his girlfriend, a a slutty d.p.s and a Steampunk guild all on one wild ride called…………………………..
So for those of you who haven’t been keeping up with this direct to DVD, low budget, “epic”, fantasy series I’m not sure what you want me to tell you. Heck even if you have been around since their initial quest for heroes I’m not sure what I can say to swing you one way or another. Either you’re on board by now or you’re not. Either you want to see how it ends or you simply don’t care at this point. Well there is one thing and that’s Kevin Sorbo who will actually be appearing in this movie. Well okay not really but rather than giving his usual piece of exposition and then wandering off in search of the food truck it feels like there’s actually a reason for it this time. He’s now running ‘The Red Thorns’, our plucky band of adventurers, and sending them out on missions like the one we find them on at the start of the movie to steal the last piece of the Darkspore from Admiral Borlund Hess a woman who will be spending the rest of the movie trying to sell herself as the replacement for Rita Repulsa for the next Power Rangers movie. Nobody point out that she’s too late as she might stop and the scene chewing we get from her is delightful.
After hijacking her war wagon and fleeing from her air ship our heroes are far from out of the woods. They’ve got Szorlok now on their tail and a rival band who are sick and tired of our heroes screwing up all the time and are here to show them how to do it right. I won’t go into too much detail as this could be the best one yet. I commented on the upswing last “episode” and that continues here with two plots that go together quite well an don’t feel too much like padding before the conclusion next film though you are starting to question how many movies this epic really needed. Though I guess that’s less this movies fault and more modern fantasy literature where every sub boss and side quest needs its own trilogy. Either way the characters are back on form with Thane understandably upset at Marek absorbing his girlfriend for a quick level up but not too pissed or mopey to not chase after very slow moving battle wagons and deflect laser bolts with his shield. Dagen is still a slut but spends the movie content to looking and not write messages on anyone’s backside. Marek is the unsure mage settling down into a simple will they won’t they with Dagen while wondering if she’s cut out for this life of high adventure and world saving exploits after all. It still feels more like a D&D game written down and filmed complete with blank muscle the game master throws as a bone to the players but ends up becoming oddly liked and appreciated by all around the table.
There’s a take on the kill count game of Legolas and Gimli though taken up a notch or two; unless Aragorn was more concerned with team morale than we knew. Battles on lava filled worlds with no reference to “the higher ground” and a return of the Dwarf from the first movie who is now an important character, apparently. Though don’t worry too much about him as I suspect he won’t be an important character in the next one and is just here to set up key plot points for the end and end it shall. This is a fairly light and fun instalment in the saga, almost non stop action with a clear lead up to the finale. Thus if you liked the darker tone the series was taking you may be less than impressed, also the revelation of the titular “Iron Crown” is about as relevant as finding out that Snape used to doodle in his text book as a child and while I’m still a little indifferent on the final part I am interested to see what Arrowstorm do next.