What is ‘Wonder Woman’ (2017)?

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As Marvel prepares to bring to a close ten years of hard work that saw them move from a small independent studio with nary a single hero anyone cared about to one that has now defined every film franchise going forward from monster movies to Robin Hood let’s see how the ‘distinguished competition’ is doing in ………………………………..

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What is ‘Wonder Woman’ (2011 Pilot)?

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When Zack Snyder saw DC’s two biggest names going at it for no desernable reason, leaving a bloody trail of bodies in each other wakes and screaming the name Martha randomly, even he knew he needed something to patch the movie together and that was a job for Wonder Woman. Soon to be the first major blockbuster female led superhero movie, not counting all the other ones we’ve had; where she dates Captain Kirk and visits World War 1. Will it be any good? I don’t know I haven’t seen it, yet. But going off all the other female led superhero movies, probably not. Still this isn’t the first stab at bringing the golden eagle chested heroine back after Lynda Carters defining role. For there was also……………………..

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What is ‘JLA: A League Of One’?

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Comic book characters get reinvented, it’s what they do. One year we want a dark and gritty Batman not afraid to do what must be done for the safety of Gotham, the next we want a more upbeat guy who owns his own space ship. Perhaps this is why DC has always done so well with Elseworlds books because their characters still manage to shine through. Make Batman a pirate or Superman a communist and you can still tell that it’s them. One exception to this though is Wonder Woman a hero seemingly arbitrarily picked to join Clark and Bruce to round out DC’s “holy trinity”. Despite being just as old and having her own camp t.v incarnation she has never quite shifted the books like the boys and this has meant that while they have adapted to the times she seems to have rebooted every few years with every writer on the block sure they know how to solve a problem like Diana Prince.

From secretary to super spy, god of war to diplomat Diana has had a rough time in comics and despite her owners decrying that she would never play second fiddle to anyone some of her best stories seem to have been found in other books. Case in point………………………………

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What is ‘Justice Riders’?

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We’ve seen vampire Batman, we’ve seen communist Superman, now sit back for marshall Diana Prince. As we head into less a dramatic re imagining and more a sub par Wild Wild West ripoff. Which is quite impressive as this came first. So for those too lazy to read today there is your review and for the rest let’s saddle up and ride into………….

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What is ‘Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice’?

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It took me a while to get around to seeing this one. What with all the reviews flying around can you blame me? But I’ve finally got around to it and if I had to waste two and half hours watching this I figured I might as well waste a few more writing this review.

This is………………………………………………………

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What is “Superman/Wonder Woman: Whom Gods Destroy”?

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Superman appeared in 1930-something and beat up bad guys with a pow, smack and a bam but Lois got old and Superman got writers block so the nazis took over. Several decades later Lois and Clark fly to Germany but there’s something on the wing! So Superman fights the evil goblin but the Germans don’t like this and so try to arrest him for saving the day. He then buggers off and with nothing better to do Lois joins the Amazonian resistance movement who make out and then set her on fire.

Meanwhile Superman must fight a Titan who beats him up and turns him into a centaur. So Super-Centaur leads his horsey harem to raid a wine cellar where he is saved by becoming a teenage girl. Meanwhile Lois must fight Wonder Woman She Wolf of the SS so Clark-ina takes on a Minotaur with a machine gun, beats the Gods and goes to live on the moon with his two girlfriends and they were all very very drunk.

Yes I have been drinking, but this is still…………………………

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